F\u00ebmij\u00ebt e mi adoleshent\u00eb dhe un\u00eb po rrinim n\u00eb kuzhin\u00ebn ton\u00eb, ashtu si\u00e7 kishim b\u00ebr\u00eb mij\u00ebra her\u00eb m\u00eb par\u00eb, kur nj\u00ebri prej tyre tha di\u00e7ka q\u00eb m\u00eb b\u00ebri t\u00eb them: “Epo, un\u00eb e konsideroj veten feministe”.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Vajza ime 14-vje\u00e7are m\u00eb shikoi me habi: \u201cA po?\u201d Djali im 16-vje\u00e7ar dukej po aq i befasuar. U trondita. A ishte ky nj\u00eb zbulim i madh p\u00ebr ta? A nuk e kishin lidhur kurr\u00eb m\u00eb par\u00eb iden\u00eb e feminizmit \u2013 absolutisht thelb\u00ebsore p\u00ebr identitetin tim \u2013 me mua, n\u00ebn\u00ebn e tyre? Me sa duket jo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Biseda q\u00eb pasoi, n\u00eb t\u00eb cil\u00ebn u p\u00ebrpoqa t\u00eb jepja p\u00ebrkufizimin tim p\u00ebr feminizmin dhe t\u00eb kuptoja t\u00eb tyrin, ishte e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb. Un\u00eb krenohem q\u00eb jam tipi i prindit q\u00eb nuk inatoset nga mendimet e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve – ata jan\u00eb qenie n\u00eb fluks, por k\u00ebsaj radhe e humba qet\u00ebsin\u00eb. E kam quajtur veten feministe t\u00eb pakt\u00ebn q\u00eb nga viti i fundit i shkoll\u00ebs s\u00eb mesme. Edhe m\u00eb her\u00ebt, si nj\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00eb q\u00eb u rrita n\u00eb vitet 1970 – dhe si vajza e autorit t\u00eb librit “\u00c7\u00ebshtje n\u00eb kritik\u00ebn e filmit feminist” (1990) – un\u00eb p\u00ebrvet\u00ebsova vlerat dhe synimet themelore t\u00eb feminizmit. Grat\u00eb duhet t\u00eb ken\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat mund\u00ebsi pune si burrat dhe t\u00eb paguhen nj\u00ebsoj p\u00ebr pun\u00ebn e tyre. Grat\u00eb jan\u00eb dhe duhet t\u00eb trajtohen si t\u00eb barabarta me burrat, n\u00eb ligj, moral dhe intelekt. Grat\u00eb duhet t\u00eb ken\u00eb kontroll mbi trupin e tyre. E k\u00ebshtu me radh\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
Kur f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e mi ishin shum\u00eb t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl, mora nj\u00eb vendim t\u00eb vet\u00ebdijsh\u00ebm, nj\u00eb vendim p\u00ebr t\u00eb cilin fillova t\u00eb pendohesha at\u00eb pasdite n\u00eb kuzhin\u00eb, q\u00eb nuk do t\u00eb merresha shum\u00eb me \u00e7\u00ebshtjen \u201cvajzat kund\u00ebr djemve\u201d dhe as nuk do t’u jepja atyre biseda t\u00eb forta p\u00ebr at\u00eb se si vajzat jan\u00eb po aq t\u00eb fuqishme sa djemt\u00eb. Pse t\u00eb fusnin n\u00eb kokat e tyre t\u00eb pafajshme iden\u00eb q\u00eb dikush e kishte menduar ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb ndryshe? Por tani pyesja veten n\u00ebse kisha gabuar. Ndoshta duhet t\u00eb kisha prezantuar fjal\u00ebn me F<\/em> koh\u00eb m\u00eb par\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Kur i shtyva m\u00eb tej f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e mi, mu b\u00eb e qart\u00eb se djali im asoconte feministet me vajzat n\u00eb shkoll\u00ebn e tij, t\u00eb cilat, sipas tij, ankoheshin vazhdimisht se ishin viktimizuar sepse ishin vajza, porse atij i dukej se kishin \u00e7do avantazh q\u00eb djemt\u00eb kan\u00eb. Vajza ime thjesht ndjente se barazia midis burrave dhe grave ishte arritur, dhe k\u00ebshtu nuk e kuptonte pse dikush sot do ta identifikonte veten me luft\u00ebn feministe. P\u00ebr t\u00eb, t\u00eb qenit feministe dukej se kishte aq kuptim sa t\u00eb qenit nj\u00eb abolicioniste. Tashm\u00eb, un\u00eb kisha lot n\u00eb syt\u00eb e mi. Si mund ta shpjegoj se, p\u00ebr mua, feminizmi nuk ka t\u00eb b\u00ebj\u00eb vet\u00ebm me ligjet dhe qasjen n\u00eb pun\u00eb, por \u00ebsht\u00eb di\u00e7ka shum\u00eb m\u00eb e madhe: nj\u00eb filozofi dhe nj\u00eb k\u00ebndv\u00ebshtrim q\u00eb informohet nga nj\u00eb studim i kujdessh\u00ebm i historis\u00eb, antropologjis\u00eb, biologjis\u00eb, sociologjis\u00eb dhe psikologjis\u00eb?<\/p>\n\n\n\n N\u00eb nj\u00eb blog n\u00eb The Guardian<\/em> k\u00ebt\u00eb qershor, nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb 17-vje\u00e7are britanike e quajtur Jinan Younis p\u00ebrshkroi se i ishte n\u00ebnshtruar nj\u00eb bresh\u00ebrie abuzimi n\u00eb Twitter nga djemt\u00eb q\u00eb ajo njihte pasi u p\u00ebrpoq t\u00eb krijonte nj\u00eb shoq\u00ebri feministe n\u00eb shkoll\u00ebn e saj. Komentet p\u00ebrfshinin deklarata t\u00eb tilla si: \u201ct\u00eb qenit feministe nuk do t\u00eb thot\u00eb se nuk e p\u00eblqejn\u00eb P [penisin], ato thjesht nuk kan\u00eb gjetur ende nj\u00eb p\u00ebr t’i k\u00ebnaqur\u201d. Abuzimi u shtua kur shoq\u00ebria feministe e Younis mori pjes\u00eb n\u00eb projektin online Who Needs Feminism<\/em>, n\u00eb t\u00eb cilin vajzat mbajn\u00eb shenja q\u00eb plot\u00ebsojn\u00eb fjalin\u00eb “Kam nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr feminiz\u00ebm sepse…”. Si\u00e7 raportoi Younis: \u201cNa u tha se vaginat tona militante ishin t\u00eb thata sa shkret\u00ebtira e Saharas\u00eb\u201d. Detajet e jet\u00ebs seksuale t\u00eb disa prej vajzave u postuan pran\u00eb fotove t\u00eb tyre, dhe t\u00eb tjerave u d\u00ebrguan mesazhe k\u00ebrc\u00ebnuese duke i paralajm\u00ebruar se gj\u00ebrat s\u00eb shpejti do t\u00eb b\u00ebheshin personale.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A pasqyrojn\u00eb komentet e tilla t\u00eb neveritshme q\u00ebndrimet e p\u00ebrhapura t\u00eb djemve adoleshent\u00eb ndaj feminizmit? A tregojn\u00eb se \u00e7far\u00eb pritjeje do t’i n\u00ebnshtroheshin vajzat adoleshente n\u00ebse e identifikojn\u00eb veten si feministe? A ishte indiferenca e f\u00ebmij\u00ebve t\u00eb mi fytyra m\u00eb e mir\u00eb e nj\u00eb armiq\u00ebsie t\u00eb p\u00ebrgjithshme adoleshente ndaj ides\u00eb s\u00eb feminizmit?<\/p>\n\n\n\n E shqet\u00ebsuar nga pyetje t\u00eb tilla, vendosa t\u00eb kryej studimin tim n\u00eb shkall\u00eb t\u00eb vog\u00ebl mbi at\u00eb se \u00e7far\u00eb adoleshent\u00ebt sot mendojn\u00eb p\u00ebr feminizmin dhe feminist\u00ebt. A ndihen ata borxhli ndaj l\u00ebvizjeve feministe t\u00eb s\u00eb shkuar\u00ebs, apo e shohin feminizmin si nj\u00eb tendenc\u00eb periferike dhe nj\u00eb histori t\u00eb par\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme?<\/p>\n\n\n\n P\u00ebr t\u00eb marr\u00eb p\u00ebrgjigje t\u00eb q\u00ebndrueshme p\u00ebr pyetje t\u00eb tilla, do t\u00eb duhej nj\u00eb studim i madh dhe vite raportimi, por prap\u00eb mund t\u00eb shihja nj\u00eb paraqitje t\u00eb shkurt\u00ebr t\u00eb s\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00ebs. N\u00eb vend q\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqem t\u00eb arrij nj\u00eb diversitet t\u00eb gjinis\u00eb, rac\u00ebs dhe klas\u00ebs n\u00eb grupin tim t\u00eb vog\u00ebl t\u00eb t\u00eb intervistuarve (15), vendosa nj\u00eb shkall\u00eb t\u00eb caktuar rast\u00ebsie. I pyeta fqinj\u00ebt e mi dhe an\u00ebtar\u00ebt e grupit tim t\u00eb librit n\u00ebse mund t\u00eb flisja me f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e tyre dhe p\u00ebrfundova me n\u00ebnt\u00eb vajza dhe gjasht\u00eb djem t\u00eb intervistuar, duke p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb dy f\u00ebmij\u00ebt e mi, t\u00eb cil\u00ebt i intervistova t\u00eb fundit, duke i b\u00ebr\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat pyetje formale q\u00eb iu kisha b\u00ebr\u00eb t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve. Mosha ishte nga 13 deri n\u00eb 19 vje\u00e7. Nj\u00ebmb\u00ebdhjet\u00eb t\u00eb intervistuar ishin t\u00eb bardh\u00eb, dy afrikano-amerikan\u00eb dhe dy ishin t\u00eb p\u00ebrzier aziatik\u00eb t\u00eb bardh\u00eb. Shtat\u00eb vijonin shkolla private, gjasht\u00eb vijonin shkolla publike dhe dy ishin t\u00eb diplomuar n\u00eb shkolla publike. Demografia ishte p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsisht me f\u00ebmij\u00eb t\u00eb klas\u00ebs s\u00eb mesme dhe t\u00eb lart\u00eb, megjith\u00ebse disa nga familjet po p\u00ebrjetonin v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi financiare p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb munges\u00ebs s\u00eb pun\u00ebs s\u00eb nj\u00eb prindi ose borxhit p\u00ebr shkollimin e tyre ose t\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebve t\u00eb tyre. Qyteti yn\u00eb anon shum\u00eb nga drejtimi liberal dhe demokrat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Kur i pyeta t\u00eb intervistuarit e mi se \u00e7far\u00eb dinin p\u00ebr historin\u00eb e t\u00eb drejtave t\u00eb grave, njohurit\u00eb e tyre ishin jasht\u00ebzakonisht t\u00eb thata. Epok\u00ebs s\u00eb skllav\u00ebris\u00eb, emancipimit dhe t\u00eb drejtave civile i kushtohet v\u00ebmendje e madhe n\u00eb shkollat tona lokale; l\u00ebvizjeve t\u00eb ndryshme t\u00eb grave m\u00eb pak: vet\u00ebm beteja p\u00ebr vot\u00ebn ishte p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb n\u00eb kurrikul\u00eb. K\u00ebta adoleshent\u00eb nuk po merrnin informacion as nga klubet jasht\u00ebshkollore. Megjith\u00ebse gjasht\u00eb shkolla lokale ishin t\u00eb p\u00ebrfaq\u00ebsuara n\u00eb grupin tim t\u00eb intervistave, vet\u00ebm nj\u00eb prej tyre kishte klub q\u00eb mund t\u00eb konsiderohej feminist. Nj\u00eb artikull i botuar n\u00eb gazet\u00ebn e shkoll\u00ebs pretendonte se grupi kishte m\u00eb shum\u00eb se 30 an\u00ebtar\u00eb t\u00eb t\u00eb dy gjinive dhe ishte krijuar p\u00ebr t’u shk\u00ebputur nga stereotipet q\u00eb zakonisht identifikohen me feminist\u00ebt. Gjith\u00e7ka q\u00eb t\u00eb intervistuarit e mi dinin p\u00ebr klubin ishte se ai kishte b\u00ebr\u00eb peticion p\u00ebr t’i lejuar vajzat t\u00eb mbanin bluza pa m\u00ebng\u00eb, gj\u00eb q\u00eb aktualisht ishte e ndaluar nga kodi i veshjes s\u00eb shkoll\u00ebs. Kjo ishte jasht\u00ebzakonisht d\u00ebshp\u00ebruese.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Adoleshent\u00ebt nuk po d\u00ebgjonin p\u00ebr feminizmin as n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi. V\u00ebshtir\u00eb se mund t\u00eb ankohesha p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb, pasi kisha zgjedhur vet\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn metod\u00eb. Pra, ku i merrnin informacionin dhe opinionet e tyre p\u00ebr feminizmin dhe barazin\u00eb gjinore? Kryesisht nga nj\u00eb amalgam\u00eb e dituris\u00eb s\u00eb pranuar, v\u00ebzhgimit personal, medias, vet\u00eb-kureshtjes, dhe si\u00e7 kuptova, p\u00ebrmes shembujve t\u00eb dh\u00ebn\u00eb nga n\u00ebnat e tyre.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Kur i pyeta t\u00eb intervistuarit e mi n\u00ebse besonin se ende ekzistonin pabarazi mes burrave dhe grave, pothuajse t\u00eb gjitha vajzat dhe rreth gjysma e djemve than\u00eb po. Vendi i pun\u00ebs u identifikua si vendndodhja e pabarazis\u00eb, n\u00eb ve\u00e7anti mungesa e grave n\u00eb pun\u00ebt m\u00eb t\u00eb paguara dhe t\u00eb profilit m\u00eb t\u00eb lart\u00eb. Nuk e di n\u00ebse kjo ishte p\u00ebr shkak se libri Lean In<\/em> (2013) i Sheryl Sandberg kishte marr\u00eb nj\u00eb v\u00ebmendje t\u00eb madhe n\u00eb at\u00eb koh\u00eb, apo sepse si f\u00ebmij\u00eb t\u00eb familjeve t\u00eb pasura, ata projektuan veten n\u00eb grupin m\u00eb me ndikim t\u00eb pun\u00ebs, por n\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi nuk kishte shum\u00eb vet\u00ebdije p\u00ebr betejat e grave n\u00eb shkall\u00ebt ekonomike m\u00eb t\u00eb ul\u00ebta.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nj\u00eb v\u00eblla dhe mot\u00ebr, 16 dhe 13 vje\u00e7, u p\u00ebrpoq\u00ebn t\u00eb kuptonin pse n\u00ebna e tyre kishte l\u00ebn\u00eb pun\u00ebn kur ishin t\u00eb vegj\u00ebl. \u201cN\u00eb shumic\u00ebn e familjeve, si n\u00eb familjen ton\u00eb, sapo n\u00ebna t\u00eb ndiej\u00eb se f\u00ebmij\u00ebt nuk kan\u00eb koh\u00eb t\u00eb mjaftueshme [me prindin], ajo do t\u00eb largohet nga puna. \u00cbsht\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb n\u00ebna, pse \u00ebsht\u00eb k\u00ebshtu?\u201d, tha v\u00ebllai. \u201cMamaja ime punoi derisa vendosi se donte t\u00eb ishte me ne m\u00eb shum\u00eb sesa t\u00eb punonte me orar t\u00eb plot\u00eb, k\u00ebshtu q\u00eb supozoj se ata ran\u00eb dakord q\u00eb mamaja ime t\u00eb t\u00ebrhiqej dhe babai im t\u00eb vazhdonte pun\u00ebn. Por nuk jam v\u00ebrtet e sigurt pse. Nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb se babai im kishte nj\u00eb pun\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb mir\u00eb apo ndonj\u00eb gj\u00eb tjet\u00ebr, t\u00eb dy kishin pun\u00eb me pages\u00eb t\u00eb ngjashme\u201d, tha motra. \u201cPse babai nuk q\u00ebndroi n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi, pse \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00ebna ajo q\u00eb duhet t\u00eb heq\u00eb dor\u00eb nga puna?\u201d, pyeti v\u00ebllai. \u201cSepse n\u00ebnat jan\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb ngrohta. N\u00ebnat jan\u00eb m\u00eb shum\u00eb N\u00ebna<\/em>\u201d, u p\u00ebrgjigj motra e tij.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nj\u00eb djal\u00eb e dalloi sportin si nj\u00eb fush\u00eb tjet\u00ebr t\u00eb pabarazis\u00eb p\u00ebr grat\u00eb, duke th\u00ebn\u00eb se sportet e grave nuk financoheshin dhe frekuentoheshin pak. Disa nga t\u00eb intervistuarit e mi, duke p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb nj\u00eb t\u00eb diplomuar q\u00eb kishte kryer pun\u00eb vullnetare dhe kishte punuar jasht\u00eb vendit, kishin nj\u00eb perspektiv\u00eb globale dhe theksuan se prostitucioni i detyruar, p\u00ebrdhunimi pa pasoja dhe skllav\u00ebrimi virtual i grave ende ekzistojn\u00eb n\u00eb shum\u00eb vende t\u00eb tjera.<\/p>\n\n\n\n N\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi, adoleshent\u00ebt me t\u00eb cil\u00ebt fola ishin t\u00eb panjoftuar mbi zhvillimet e fundit n\u00eb lidhje me t\u00eb drejtat e grave. Ata kishin informata mbi incidente t\u00eb izoluara q\u00eb t\u00ebrhoq\u00ebn shum\u00eb v\u00ebmendjen e mediave, t\u00eb tilla si komentet e b\u00ebra n\u00eb vitin 2012 nga Todd Aiken, an\u00ebtar i Dhom\u00ebs s\u00eb P\u00ebrfaq\u00ebsuesve, i cili tha se \u201cp\u00ebrdhunimi legjitim\u201d nuk mund t\u00eb rezultoj\u00eb n\u00eb shtatz\u00ebni, ose edhe p\u00ebr panelin q\u00eb drejtoi nj\u00eb seanc\u00eb d\u00ebgjimore mbi kontrollin e lindjeve, panel i cili ishte i t\u00ebri i p\u00ebrb\u00ebr\u00eb nga burrat. Radioja Publike Komb\u00ebtare (NPR) ishte m\u00eb s\u00eb shpeshti burimi i informacioneve t\u00eb tilla, ku f\u00ebmij\u00ebt d\u00ebgjonin lajme kur prind\u00ebrit e tyre i kishin ndezur televizionet. Prind\u00ebr keni parasysh: ekziston ende nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb p\u00ebr t’u siguruar q\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebt tuaj po i p\u00ebrvet\u00ebsojn\u00eb lajmet.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Dyshoj se k\u00ebta adoleshent\u00eb nuk jan\u00eb m\u00eb injorant\u00eb p\u00ebr sken\u00ebn politike sesa homolog\u00ebt e tyre t\u00eb m\u00ebparsh\u00ebm. Nuk mbaj mend t\u00eb kem kuptuar shum\u00eb procesin politik t\u00eb SHBA-s\u00eb apo polemikat aktuale deri sa shkova n\u00eb universitet, edhe pse un\u00eb dhe miqt\u00eb e mi, ndryshe nga shumica e adoleshent\u00ebve sot, lexonim rregullisht gazet\u00ebn e p\u00ebrditshme dhe shikonim lajmet e mbr\u00ebmjes n\u00eb TV. Megjithat\u00eb, un\u00eb u habita nga mungesa e njohurive t\u00eb t\u00eb intervistuarve t\u00eb mi p\u00ebr l\u00ebvizjen e grave. Historia politike e 20 apo 40 viteve t\u00eb fundit ishte pothuajse bosh p\u00ebr shumic\u00ebn prej tyre. Nj\u00eb e moshuar kishte m\u00eb shum\u00eb informacion p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb nj\u00eb shkolle n\u00eb t\u00eb cil\u00ebn kishte b\u00ebr\u00eb nj\u00eb prezantim mbi historin\u00eb ligjore dhe sociale t\u00eb dhun\u00ebs ndaj grave. Vet\u00ebm kat\u00ebr adoleshent\u00eb, nj\u00eb prej tyre djal\u00eb, p\u00ebrmend\u00ebn \u00e7\u00ebshtjen gjyq\u00ebsore Roe kund\u00ebr Wade t\u00eb vitit 1973, e cila legalizoi abortin n\u00eb SHBA, ose betej\u00ebn p\u00ebr t\u00eb drejtat riprodhuese n\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi; vet\u00ebm nj\u00eb prej tyre p\u00ebrmendi termin “vala e dyt\u00eb” dhe l\u00ebvizjen e grave t\u00eb viteve 1970. Kur e pyeta se ku kishte m\u00ebsuar p\u00ebr k\u00ebto gj\u00ebra, ajo tha se ishte kryesisht nga nj\u00eb artikull n\u00eb Jezebel ose nga Wikipedia.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nd\u00ebrsa shumica e adoleshent\u00ebve pohuan se nuk shihnin pabarazi gjinore n\u00eb shkollat \u200b\u200be tyre, disa raportuan se djemt\u00eb ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb nuk i merrnin seriozisht mendimet e vajzave brenda ose jasht\u00eb klas\u00ebs dhe se n\u00eb klas\u00eb djemt\u00eb flisnin m\u00eb shum\u00eb se vajzat. Nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb 15-vje\u00e7are u ankua se n\u00eb jav\u00ebn e par\u00eb t\u00eb shkoll\u00ebs s\u00eb mesme, m\u00ebsuesja e saj e matematik\u00ebs, nj\u00eb grua, shprehu habin\u00eb q\u00eb klasa kishte m\u00eb shum\u00eb vajza sesa djem. \u201cAta presin q\u00eb djemt\u00eb t\u00eb jen\u00eb m\u00eb inteligjent\u00eb\u201d, tha studentja.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u00c7\u00ebshtja p\u00ebr t\u00eb cil\u00ebn vajzat – jo djemt\u00eb – aludonin m\u00eb shpesh pas \u00e7\u00ebshtjes s\u00eb vendit t\u00eb pun\u00ebs dhe munges\u00ebs s\u00eb respektit shoq\u00ebror, ishte ajo q\u00eb disa prej tyre e quajt\u00ebn \u201ckultura e p\u00ebrdhunimit\u201d ose \u201cslut-shaming\u201d. Ato n\u00ebnkuptonin inkurajimin e agresionit seksual mashkullor dhe faj\u00ebsimin ose turp\u00ebrimin e grave q\u00eb dhunohen seksualisht ose q\u00eb sillen n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb m\u00eb t\u00eb hapur seksuale. N\u00ebse ka nj\u00eb ide feministe t\u00eb val\u00ebs s\u00eb dyt\u00eb q\u00eb duket se mbahet si nj\u00eb nen besimi nga adoleshent\u00ebt q\u00eb nuk kan\u00eb d\u00ebgjuar kurr\u00eb p\u00ebr Susan Brownmiller, ajo ide \u00ebsht\u00eb se p\u00ebrdhunimi nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb krim i d\u00ebshir\u00ebs seksuale, por i pushtetit. M\u00eb kujtohet se si m\u00eb tronditi ai formulim kur lexova vepr\u00ebn e Brownmiller-it \u201cKund\u00ebr vullnetit ton\u00eb\u201d (1975) kur isha 18 ose 19 vje\u00e7. Tani kjo ide thjesht merret si e mir\u00ebqen\u00eb. Nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb 15-vje\u00e7are m\u00eb tha se p\u00ebrdhunimi ishte \u201cfakti q\u00eb nj\u00eb burr\u00eb mendon se duhet t\u00eb jet\u00eb superior\u00eb ndaj grave dhe kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb e vetmja m\u00ebnyr\u00eb q\u00eb munden ta manifestojn\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb superioritet\u201d. Nj\u00eb djal\u00eb 16-vje\u00e7ar tha se p\u00ebrdhunimi ishte i lidhur me faktin se \u201cdisa burra besojn\u00eb se kan\u00eb pushtet mbi grat\u00eb ose mund t\u00eb marrin grat\u00eb n\u00ebn kontroll. Kjo tregon se ata i mendojn\u00eb grat\u00eb si qenie inferiore\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Tre t\u00eb intervistuarit m\u00eb t\u00eb z\u00ebsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr problemin e kultur\u00ebs s\u00eb p\u00ebrdhunimit ishin nd\u00ebr m\u00eb t\u00eb moshuarit. Nj\u00eb nga t\u00eb diplomuarit m\u00eb tha se “p\u00ebrdhunimi \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje e madhe n\u00eb kampuset e universiteteve”. Ajo foli p\u00ebr nj\u00eb grua n\u00eb nj\u00eb universitet af\u00ebr saj, raportimet e s\u00eb cil\u00ebs p\u00ebr p\u00ebrdhunim nuk u besuan dhe e cila m\u00eb pas shfaqi simptoma post-traumatike. Ajo p\u00ebrmendi se orientimi i saj n\u00eb universitet p\u00ebrfshinte prezantime q\u00eb shpjegonin se si grat\u00eb mund t\u00eb shmangin p\u00ebrdhunimin. Skenar\u00ebt hipotetik\u00eb t\u00eb paraqitur n\u00eb to dukej se faj\u00ebsonin gruan, me shkrime si: “Ajo duhet t\u00eb kishte qen\u00eb m\u00eb e qart\u00eb p\u00ebr at\u00eb q\u00eb donte; Ajo nuk duhet t\u00eb kishte qen\u00eb e dehur\u201d. \u201cVajzat ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb m\u00ebsojn\u00eb q\u00eb n\u00eb mosh\u00eb t\u00eb re se duhet t\u00eb ken\u00eb frik\u00eb nga p\u00ebrdhunimi. Kam folur me miq q\u00eb jan\u00eb v\u00ebrtet t\u00eb shqet\u00ebsuar p\u00ebr p\u00ebrdhunimin edhe pse nuk jan\u00eb as n\u00eb situata k\u00ebrc\u00ebnuese. Ata thjesht shqet\u00ebsohen p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb n\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi, si nj\u00eb lloj gj\u00ebje abstrakte. Dhe kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb gj\u00ebja m\u00eb e tmerrshme! Kjo nuk duhet t\u00eb jet\u00eb di\u00e7ka p\u00ebr t\u00eb cil\u00ebn njer\u00ebzit duhet shqet\u00ebsuar n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb konstante\u201d, shtoi ajo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n E diplomuara tjet\u00ebr tregoi nj\u00eb histori t\u00eb ngjashme. N\u00eb vitin e saj t\u00eb fundit t\u00eb shkoll\u00ebs s\u00eb mesme, grupi n\u00eb klas\u00ebn e saj rreth sh\u00ebndetit lexoi nj\u00eb histori p\u00ebr nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb q\u00eb ishte p\u00ebrdhunuar n\u00eb nj\u00eb fest\u00eb. “Pas leximit, un\u00eb dhe dy vajza t\u00eb tjera kaluam pjes\u00ebn e mbetur t\u00eb klas\u00ebs duke u p\u00ebrpjekur t\u00eb bindnim nj\u00eb grup djemsh se, pavar\u00ebsisht se \u00e7far\u00eb kishte th\u00ebn\u00eb apo kishte veshur viktima n\u00eb histori, p\u00ebrdhunimi ishte 100 p\u00ebrqind faji i p\u00ebrdhunuesit. Ne ishim t\u00eb pasuksesshme. Ne nuk ishim t\u00eb vetmet vajza n\u00eb grup, i cili ishte mjaft i madh. Profesori nuk nd\u00ebrhyri asnj\u00ebher\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb th\u00ebn\u00eb se ne kishim t\u00eb drejt\u00eb; n\u00eb vend t\u00eb k\u00ebsaj, ai mori pjes\u00eb sikur t\u00eb ishte duke organizuar nj\u00eb debat abstrakt filozofik dhe n\u00eb fakt sugjeroi q\u00eb njer\u00ebzit t’i caktonin secilit personazh n\u00eb histori nga nj\u00eb p\u00ebrqindje t\u00eb fajit\u201d, shkroi ajo n\u00eb nj\u00eb email drejtuar mua.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Nj\u00eb maturante e shkoll\u00ebs s\u00eb mesme tha se kultura e p\u00ebrdhunimit ka t\u00eb b\u00ebj\u00eb me “mend\u00ebsin\u00eb se seksi \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb produkt”. \u201c\u00cbsht\u00eb ideja se seksi \u00ebsht\u00eb di\u00e7ka q\u00eb burrat d\u00ebshirojn\u00eb dhe q\u00eb grat\u00eb duhet ta japin n\u00eb k\u00ebmbim t\u00eb mb\u00ebshtetjes emocionale ose takimeve t\u00eb k\u00ebndshme. Nga k\u00ebndv\u00ebshtrimi mashkullor, mendohet se \u2018OK, n\u00ebse b\u00ebj k\u00ebt\u00eb dhe k\u00ebt\u00eb, at\u00ebher\u00eb e meritoj seksin… N\u00ebse nuk jeni duke b\u00ebr\u00eb seks me mua ose nuk jeni n\u00eb nj\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnie romantike me mua, at\u00ebher\u00eb un\u00eb jam disi i mashtruar\u2019\u201d, shtjelloi ajo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n P\u00ebr t\u00eb intervistuarit e mi, kultura e p\u00ebrdhunimit dhe slut-shaming dukeshin m\u00eb shum\u00eb si presione atmosferike sesa forca me t\u00eb cilat do t\u00eb p\u00ebrballeshin n\u00eb jet\u00ebn e tyre. Por kjo mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb pasoj\u00eb e asaj q\u00eb t\u00eb intervistuarit e mi nuk po m\u00eb ofronin detaje rreth p\u00ebrvojave t\u00eb tyre seksuale dhe romantike. Disa prej tyre ishin shum\u00eb t\u00eb rinj p\u00ebr t\u00eb pasur ndonj\u00eb t\u00eb till\u00eb. Kur intervistova me t\u00eb moshuarit, ata pretenduan se kishin p\u00ebrjetuar pak dilema t\u00eb rolit gjinor me partner\u00ebt e tyre t\u00eb seksit t\u00eb kund\u00ebrt (asnj\u00eb prej tyre nuk u vet\u00ebp\u00ebrcaktua, t\u00eb pakt\u00ebn p\u00ebr mua, si homoseksual). Nj\u00eb djal\u00eb 15-vje\u00e7ar m\u00eb tha se rolet tradicionale gjinore ende q\u00ebndrojn\u00eb kur b\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb p\u00ebr makinat. \u201cZakonisht nuk shoh nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb duke e vozitur nj\u00eb djal\u00eb, p\u00ebrve\u00e7 n\u00ebse vajza \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb e madhe dhe djali nuk mund t\u00eb ngas\u00eb makin\u00ebn\u201d, tha ai. Kur e pyeta t\u00eb spekulonte pse kjo ndodh, ai tha: \u201cNuk e di, n\u00eb fakt. \u00cbsht\u00eb di\u00e7ka q\u00eb thjesht ekziston. Gjithmon\u00eb n\u00eb filma e shohim se djali e merr vajz\u00ebn nga sht\u00ebpia, djali e kthen n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Pra, t\u00eb intervistuarit e mi ishin t\u00eb vet\u00ebdijsh\u00ebm p\u00ebr pabarazin\u00eb gjinore dhe disa nga vajzat ishin t\u00eb sensibilizuara p\u00ebr lidhjet midis seksualitetit dhe pushtetit. Por a e p\u00ebrkufizuan ata n\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb kultur\u00ebn e p\u00ebrdhunimit dhe p\u00ebrdhunimin si \u00e7\u00ebshtje feministe? Po n\u00eb lidhje me \u00e7\u00ebshtjet e lidhura me trupin dhe seksualitetin, si aborti dhe dhuna n\u00eb familje? P\u00ebr mua nuk ka dyshim se jan\u00eb t\u00eb lidhura. Ju nuk mund ta kuptoni plot\u00ebsisht mbizot\u00ebrimin e k\u00ebtyre realiteteve shoq\u00ebrore, apo ndikimin e tyre tek grat\u00eb, pa kuptuar sesi shoq\u00ebrit\u00eb n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb alternative i kan\u00eb ndaluar, inkurajuar, injoruar ose mbuluar k\u00ebto akte. K\u00ebshtu q\u00eb pyeta secilin nga t\u00eb intervistuarat e mia n\u00ebse e shihnin p\u00ebrdhunimin, abortin ose dhun\u00ebn n\u00eb familje si \u00e7\u00ebshtje specifike feministe. Vajzat m\u00eb t\u00eb moshuara prireshin t\u00eb thoshin po. \u201cAborti \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje feministe n\u00eb at\u00eb q\u00eb pjesa m\u00eb e madhe e debatit rreth moralit t\u00eb nd\u00ebrprerjes s\u00eb shtatz\u00ebnis\u00eb n\u00ebnvler\u00ebson opinionin dhe mir\u00ebqenien e gruas me f\u00ebmij\u00eb. N\u00eb nj\u00eb kuptim t\u00eb ngjash\u00ebm, p\u00ebrdhunimi dhe dhuna n\u00eb familje jan\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje feministe jo sepse jan\u00eb unike p\u00ebr grat\u00eb, por p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00ebs se si diskutohen n\u00eb media dhe trajtohen nga ligji\u201d, u p\u00ebrgjigj nj\u00ebra prej tyre.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Por disa nga djemt\u00eb dhe vajzat m\u00eb t\u00eb vogla ishin n\u00eb m\u00ebdyshje. Ata dukej se mendonin se “feministe” do t\u00eb thoshte “\u00e7\u00ebshtje vet\u00ebm p\u00ebr grat\u00eb”. Disa u p\u00ebrgjigj\u00ebn se \u2013 ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb me bezdi \u2013 \u201cJo, kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje njer\u00ebzore\u201d. U theksua se edhe burrat p\u00ebrdhunohen dhe rrihen, k\u00ebshtu q\u00eb p\u00ebrdhunimi dhe dhuna n\u00eb familje nuk mund t\u00eb jen\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje feministe. Nd\u00ebrsa fol\u00ebm m\u00eb shum\u00eb, disa than\u00eb se aborti, p\u00ebrdhunimi dhe dhuna n\u00eb familje mund t\u00eb shiheshin si \u00e7\u00ebshtje feministe n\u00eb raste t\u00eb caktuara – p\u00ebr shembull, n\u00ebse policia ose gjykatat refuzonin t\u00eb ndiqnin nj\u00eb rast p\u00ebrdhunimi. Nj\u00eb djal\u00eb 16-vje\u00e7ar tha se edhe ky i fundit nuk do ta konsideronte domosdoshm\u00ebrisht p\u00ebrdhunimin nj\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje feministe. \u201cNdjenja ime \u00ebsht\u00eb se n\u00ebse kjo do t\u00eb ndodhte, nuk do t\u00eb ishte p\u00ebr shkak se p\u00ebrdhunimi nuk u mor seriozisht, por sepse \u00ebsht\u00eb shum\u00eb e v\u00ebshtir\u00eb t\u00eb ndjek\u00ebsh penalisht \u00e7\u00ebshtjet e p\u00ebrdhunimit. Duhet t\u00eb merren prova fizike shpejt, dhe n\u00ebse nuk munden t\u00eb merren, \u00ebsht\u00eb d\u00ebshmia e nj\u00eb personi kund\u00ebr nj\u00eb tjetri, p\u00ebrve\u00e7 n\u00ebse ka d\u00ebshmitar\u00eb. Cili prokuror do t\u00eb donte t\u00eb merrte nj\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje q\u00eb nuk mund ta fitonte? \u00cbsht\u00eb e drejt\u00eb q\u00eb nuk duhet t\u00eb d\u00ebnohesh n\u00eb k\u00ebto raste:, shtoi ai. I nj\u00ebjti djal\u00eb tha se aborti dikur ishte nj\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje feministe, por q\u00eb nga Roe kund\u00ebr Wade, nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb e till\u00eb. Kur theksova se shum\u00eb shtete t\u00eb SHBA-s\u00eb po zvog\u00eblojn\u00eb qasjen n\u00eb abort, ai ndryshoi mendje, duke th\u00ebn\u00eb se nuk e kishte ditur k\u00ebt\u00eb dhe se mund ta shihte mbrojtjen e asaj q\u00eb tashm\u00eb ishte arritur si nj\u00eb q\u00ebllim feminist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n N\u00ebse shkollat tona japin mesazhe t\u00eb p\u00ebrziera, n\u00ebse feminizmi nuk diskutohet n\u00eb sht\u00ebpi dhe n\u00ebse disa stereotipe gjinore ende q\u00ebndrojn\u00eb, ku po e marrin k\u00ebta adoleshent\u00eb pranimin baz\u00eb t\u00eb ides\u00eb s\u00eb barazis\u00eb gjinore? Ata e pranuan se besonin n\u00eb at\u00eb ide. Shum\u00eb kishin nj\u00eb p\u00ebrgjigje t\u00eb thjesht\u00eb p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb pyetje: n\u00ebnat e tyre. Nuk dukej se kishte r\u00ebnd\u00ebsi n\u00ebse ato n\u00ebna punonin jasht\u00eb sht\u00ebpis\u00eb apo jo. \u201cGjat\u00eb f\u00ebmij\u00ebris\u00eb sime n\u00ebna ime gjithmon\u00eb kishte nj\u00eb karrier\u00eb. Gjithmon\u00eb kam menduar se burrat dhe grat\u00eb duhet t\u00eb jen\u00eb t\u00eb barabart\u00eb\u201d, tha nj\u00ebra prej vajzave. Kur theksova se n\u00ebna e saj kishte l\u00ebn\u00eb pun\u00ebn p\u00ebr t\u00eb rritur kat\u00ebr f\u00ebmij\u00eb dhe ishte kthyer n\u00eb pun\u00eb vet\u00ebm kur e intervistuara ime, f\u00ebmija i tret\u00eb ishte rreth n\u00ebnt\u00eb vje\u00e7, ajo u p\u00ebrgjigj: \u201cNuk di si ta shpjegoj. Ajo n\u00eb nj\u00ebfar\u00eb m\u00ebnyre gjithmon\u00eb ka qen\u00eb nj\u00eb n\u00ebn\u00eb q\u00eb punonte; ajo ka qen\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb shum\u00eb ambicioze\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n \u201cMamaja ime ka nj\u00eb pozit\u00eb t\u00eb fort\u00eb n\u00eb pun\u00eb dhe ajo sapo u avancua. K\u00ebshtu q\u00eb un\u00eb kam qen\u00eb rreth grave n\u00eb pozita m\u00eb t\u00eb larta. Ajo ka nj\u00eb ndikim t\u00eb mir\u00eb tek un\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb m\u00eb shtyr\u00eb t\u00eb jem e fort\u00eb dhe e pavarur. Shum\u00eb nga shoqet e mia kan\u00eb prind\u00ebr q\u00eb jan\u00eb divorcuar, k\u00ebshtu q\u00eb ato kan\u00eb n\u00ebna q\u00eb jan\u00eb t\u00eb forta\u201d, m\u00eb tha nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb tjet\u00ebr. Megjithat\u00eb, nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb tjet\u00ebr tha se n\u00ebna e saj, e cila nuk ishte e pun\u00ebsuar, nuk i kishte folur kurr\u00eb drejtp\u00ebrdrejt p\u00ebr feminizmin, por ishte n\u00ebn\u00eb e fort\u00eb e cila ia kishte p\u00ebrcjell\u00eb mesazhin se \u201cnuk duhet t’i lini njer\u00ebzit t’ju pengojn\u00eb; ju mund t\u00eb b\u00ebni \u00e7far\u00eb t\u00eb doni\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n A i shtyn k\u00ebto adoleshente transmetimi i q\u00ebndrimeve t\u00eb tilla q\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrkufizohen si feministe? Iu ktheva pyetjes me t\u00eb cil\u00ebn fillova – \u00e7far\u00eb mendojn\u00eb v\u00ebrtet adoleshent\u00ebt p\u00ebr at\u00eb term? Edhe pse kisha frik\u00eb se shum\u00eb nga k\u00ebta t\u00eb rinj do t\u00eb thoshin se feministet ishin burra-urrejt\u00ebse t\u00eb zem\u00ebruara q\u00eb digjnin sutjenat, u befasova k\u00ebndsh\u00ebm. Akuza se feministet ankoheshin shum\u00eb ishte komenti m\u00eb negativ q\u00eb u dha. Disa t\u00eb intervistuar nuk mund t\u00eb krijonin nj\u00eb paramendim p\u00ebr nj\u00eb feministe por mes atyre q\u00eb e krjuan, Rosie the Riveter ishte p\u00ebrgjigjja m\u00eb e shpesht\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Kjo figur\u00eb propagandistike amerikane e epok\u00ebs s\u00eb Luft\u00ebs s\u00eb Dyt\u00eb Bot\u00ebrore, me m\u00ebng\u00ebt e saj t\u00eb p\u00ebrveshura dhe bicepsin e zhvilluar, \u00ebsht\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb disi nj\u00eb ikon\u00eb e p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsuar e forc\u00ebs dhe kompetenc\u00ebs fem\u00ebrore. F\u00ebmij\u00ebt kishin m\u00ebsuar p\u00ebr Rosie-n nga burime t\u00eb ndryshme – disa nga shkolla; nga nj\u00eb v\u00eblla a mot\u00ebr, nga fakti se n\u00ebna e tyre kishte marr\u00eb nj\u00eb kuti mjetesh p\u00ebr dit\u00eblindjen e saj me nj\u00eb kart\u00eb Rosie (Ne mundemi!). Isha e lumtur q\u00eb kujtesa e tyre ishte kaq pozitive, por nuk jam e sigurt se \u00e7far\u00eb t\u00eb mendoj p\u00ebr faktin se pothuajse askush nuk p\u00ebrmendi nj\u00eb figur\u00eb m\u00eb bashk\u00ebkohore. Hillary Clinton? Alice Walker? Tina Fey? Nj\u00eb 17-vje\u00e7are tha se mendonte p\u00ebr Buffy the Vampire Slayer dhe Barack Obama, teksa ai ishte shfaqur n\u00eb montazhin e kopertin\u00ebs s\u00eb revist\u00ebs Ms.<\/em> n\u00eb vitin 2009, duke grisur k\u00ebmish\u00ebn e tij p\u00ebr t\u00eb zbuluar sloganin: K\u00ebshtu duket nj\u00eb feminist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Sa i p\u00ebrket faktit n\u00ebse t\u00eb intervistuarit e mi e shihnin veten si feminist\u00eb\/e, p\u00ebrgjigjet ishin t\u00eb ndara. Asnj\u00eb nga djemt\u00eb nuk e pranoi k\u00ebt\u00eb, me p\u00ebrjashtim t\u00eb nj\u00eb 18-vje\u00e7ari q\u00eb u p\u00ebrgjigj me po dhe jo, duke sugjeruar se nuk ishte i sigurt se termi “feminist” mund t\u00eb p\u00ebrdorej p\u00ebr nj\u00eb burr\u00eb. Djem t\u00eb tjer\u00eb dhe nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb, m\u00eb than\u00eb se nj\u00eb djal\u00eb apo nj\u00eb burr\u00eb nuk mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb feminist. Dy t\u00eb tretat e vajzave than\u00eb se ishin feministe. Mosha b\u00ebri t\u00eb gjith\u00eb ndryshimin. T\u00eb gjitha vajzat e mosh\u00ebs 16 vje\u00e7 e lart than\u00eb se ishin feministe, nd\u00ebrsa t\u00eb gjitha, p\u00ebrve\u00e7 nj\u00ebr\u00ebs prej vajzave m\u00eb t\u00eb reja, than\u00eb se nuk ishin feministe ose kishin v\u00ebshtir\u00ebsi t’i p\u00ebrgjigjeshin pyetjes.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Un\u00eb u largova nga bisedat e mia duke u ndjer\u00eb mjaft optimiste p\u00ebr adoleshent\u00ebt e sot\u00ebm, t\u00eb pakt\u00ebn ata q\u00eb po pranojn\u00eb arsimim t\u00eb mir\u00eb dhe jetojn\u00eb n\u00eb familje t\u00eb q\u00ebndrueshme. Edhe pse shum\u00eb prej tyre nuk kishin nj\u00eb koncept ve\u00e7an\u00ebrisht t\u00eb sakt\u00eb ose t\u00eb detajuar t\u00eb feminizmit, shumica dukej se kishin zhvilluar zakonet e mendjes – kuriozitetin, skepticizmin, respektin p\u00ebr informacionin e ri; t\u00eb gjitha k\u00ebto kan\u00eb t\u00eb ngjar\u00eb t’i \u00e7ojn\u00eb ata n\u00eb pozicione t\u00eb mir\u00eb-menduara p\u00ebr k\u00ebto \u00e7\u00ebshtje.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Megjithat\u00eb, n\u00eb disa aspekte, mbetem e shqet\u00ebsuar. Un\u00eb nuk e kuptoj se si termi \u201cfeminist\u201d do t\u00eb fitoj\u00eb ndonj\u00ebher\u00eb m\u00eb shum\u00eb pranim sesa ka tani, kur t\u00eb rriturit dhe adoleshent\u00ebt nj\u00ebsoj vazhdojn\u00eb ta p\u00ebrkufizojn\u00eb at\u00eb n\u00eb m\u00ebnyra t\u00eb ngushta. Kur i pyeta vajzat q\u00eb nuk e konsideronin veten feministe pse nuk e konsideronin ashtu, ato than\u00eb ose se nuk ishin aktiviste ose sepse \u00e7\u00ebshtje t\u00eb tjera ishin m\u00eb t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme p\u00ebr to. Un\u00eb e shoh feminizmin si nj\u00eb lente p\u00ebrmes s\u00eb cil\u00ebs mund t\u00eb shikosh bot\u00ebn, ose si nj\u00eb grup mjetesh interpretuese. Por shumica e k\u00ebtyre t\u00eb rinjve e shohin feminizmin si nj\u00eb akt. B\u00ebhet fjal\u00eb p\u00ebr mbajtjen e pankartave dhe krijimin e tollovive. \u00cbsht\u00eb gjithashtu nj\u00eb em\u00ebrtim ekskluziv. Nj\u00eb 15-vje\u00e7are tha se nuk mund ta quante veten feministe sepse kishte prioritete t\u00eb tjera – n\u00eb rastin e saj, nj\u00eb interes p\u00ebr qeverin\u00eb dhe at\u00eb q\u00eb ajo e quajti udh\u00ebheqje. Ajo nuk e shihte t\u00eb qenit feministe si di\u00e7ka q\u00eb mund t\u00eb bashk\u00ebjetonte dhe madje t\u00eb informonte ato pasione t\u00eb saj.<\/p>\n\n\n\n N\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjt\u00ebn koh\u00eb, mungesa e baz\u00ebs n\u00eb historin\u00eb dhe mendimin feminist mund t\u00eb prodhoj\u00eb gjithashtu nj\u00eb feminiz\u00ebm aq t\u00eb gjer\u00eb sa e b\u00ebn t\u00eb jet\u00eb i pakuptimt\u00eb. Nj\u00eb 17-vje\u00e7are m\u00eb tha se besonte se ne ishim n\u00eb nj\u00eb faz\u00eb n\u00eb t\u00eb cil\u00ebn feminizmi \u00ebsht\u00eb “\u00e7far\u00ebdo q\u00eb ne duam t\u00eb jet\u00eb”. \u201cN\u00ebse ti [nj\u00eb grua] gjen di\u00e7ka fuqizuese p\u00ebr ty, shum\u00eb mir\u00eb. N\u00ebse d\u00ebshironi t\u00eb jeni sht\u00ebpiake dhe t\u00eb b\u00ebni biskota gjat\u00eb gjith\u00eb dit\u00ebs, p\u00ebrs\u00ebri shum\u00eb mir\u00eb. N\u00ebse jo, p\u00ebrs\u00ebri shum\u00eb mir\u00eb\u201d, shpjegoi ajo. E pyeta n\u00ebse kishte ndonj\u00eb akt q\u00eb ajo nuk do ta quante feminist vet\u00ebm sepse nj\u00eb grua e deklaroi si t\u00eb till\u00eb. Ajo p\u00ebrmendi nj\u00eb raport p\u00ebr nj\u00eb grua q\u00eb kishte nxjerr\u00eb n\u00eb ankand n\u00eb internet virgj\u00ebrin\u00eb e saj. Gruaja deklaroi se ky ishte nj\u00eb akt feminist, sepse ajo po e kthente vler\u00ebn q\u00eb shoq\u00ebria patriarkale i v\u00eb virgj\u00ebris\u00eb s\u00eb nj\u00eb gruaje, n\u00eb p\u00ebrfitimin p\u00ebr vete. “Por n\u00ebse po p\u00ebrfitoni vet\u00ebm ju, nuk mund ta quani at\u00eb akt feminist. Ai akt ende po promovon patriarkatin\u201d, shtoi studentja. Kjo studente \u00ebsht\u00eb qart\u00ebsisht mjaft e sofistikuar p\u00ebr t\u00eb b\u00ebr\u00eb dallime, por \u201cfeminizmi \u00ebsht\u00eb \u00e7far\u00ebdo q\u00eb ne duam t\u00eb jet\u00eb\u201d \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb nocion miq\u00ebsor i kultur\u00ebs pop q\u00eb mund t\u00eb \u00e7oj\u00eb n\u00eb rezultate perverse.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Kur e pyeta k\u00ebt\u00eb studente qartazi t\u00eb pasionuar dhe t\u00eb motivuar se n\u00ebse kishte lexuar ndonj\u00eb nga librat kryesor\u00eb mbi feminizmin, ajo tha nuk e kishte lexuar as Susan Brownmiller, as Susan Faludi, as Naomi Wolf dhe as Betty Friedan, megjith\u00ebse kishte d\u00ebgjuar p\u00ebr librin e saj The Feminine Mystique<\/em> dhe planifikonte ta lexonte nd\u00ebrkoh\u00eb. Q\u00eb t\u00eb zhyten n\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb literatur\u00eb mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb k\u00ebrkes\u00eb shum\u00eb e madhe p\u00ebr nx\u00ebn\u00ebs t\u00eb shkollave t\u00eb mesme. Por n\u00ebse edhe ky rast i ve\u00e7ant\u00eb – nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb 17-vje\u00e7are q\u00eb tha se e kishte quajtur veten feministe q\u00eb n\u00eb mosh\u00ebn gjasht\u00eb vje\u00e7are – jo vet\u00ebm nuk kishte lexuar, por nuk dukej se ishte n\u00eb dijeni t\u00eb shumic\u00ebs s\u00eb let\u00ebrsis\u00eb feministe t\u00eb val\u00ebs s\u00eb dyt\u00eb dhe pas val\u00ebs s\u00eb dyt\u00eb, mendoj se krijon arsye p\u00ebr shqet\u00ebsim. Ajo mund t’i lexoj k\u00ebto libra n\u00eb universitet – nuk do t\u00eb habitesha; un\u00eb vet\u00eb nuk arrita t\u2019i lexoj ato deri n\u00eb universitet. Por shumica e bashk\u00ebmoshatareve t\u00eb saj, dhe pothuajse t\u00eb gjith\u00eb bashk\u00ebmoshatar\u00ebt e saj djem, ndoshta nuk do t’i lexojn\u00eb kurr\u00eb ato. Ata nuk do t\u00eb ndjekin ligj\u00ebratat e studimeve mbi grat\u00eb; ata nuk do ta bazojn\u00eb impulsin e tyre refleksiv drejt barazis\u00eb me nj\u00eb njohuri q\u00eb do ta b\u00ebj\u00eb at\u00eb m\u00eb fleksib\u00ebl dhe m\u00eb t\u00eb q\u00ebndrueshme, n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb q\u00eb t\u00eb mund t\u00eb nxjerrin p\u00ebrfundime koherente p\u00ebr rastin e ardhsh\u00ebm t\u00eb p\u00ebrdhunimit ose debatin mbi buxhetin ose padin\u00eb p\u00ebr diskriminim n\u00eb lajme.<\/p>\n\n\n\n T\u00eb rinjt\u00eb e sot\u00ebm ndoshta jan\u00eb m\u00eb egalitar se \u00e7do brez i m\u00ebparsh\u00ebm. Por ata ka gjasa t\u00eb mos gjejn\u00eb nj\u00eb kuptim p\u00ebr termin e pakapsh\u00ebm “feminist”, dhe kjo \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb humbje p\u00ebr t\u00eb gjith\u00eb ne.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Pamela Erens<\/p>\n\n\n\n E p\u00ebrktheu: Riola Morina<\/p>\n\n\n\n