{"id":7361,"date":"2023-08-15T12:34:25","date_gmt":"2023-08-15T11:34:25","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/qika.org\/?post_type=lexo-post&p=7361"},"modified":"2023-08-15T12:34:27","modified_gmt":"2023-08-15T11:34:27","slug":"te-behesh-grua-simone-de-beauvoir-mbi-misherimin-e-femerores","status":"publish","type":"lexo-post","link":"https:\/\/qika.org\/en\/lexo-post\/te-behesh-grua-simone-de-beauvoir-mbi-misherimin-e-femerores\/","title":{"rendered":"T\u00eb b\u00ebhesh grua: Simone de Beauvoir mbi mish\u00ebrimin e fem\u00ebrores"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

\u201cGrua nuk lind, b\u00ebhesh<\/em>\u201d \u2013 Simone de Beauvoir<\/p>\n\n\n\n

N\u00eb p\u00ebrgjith\u00ebsi p\u00ebr ekzistencialist\u00ebt, njeriu lind si asgj\u00eb: gjith\u00e7ka q\u00eb jemi \u00ebsht\u00eb rezultat i zgjedhjeve tona, meq\u00eb ne e nd\u00ebrtojm\u00eb veten nga burimet tona dhe ato q\u00eb na ofron shoq\u00ebria. Ne jo vet\u00ebm q\u00eb i krijojm\u00eb vlerat tona; ne krijojm\u00eb vetveten. Simone de Beauvoir, ndon\u00ebse nj\u00eb ekzistencialiste e betuar gjat\u00eb gjith\u00eb jet\u00ebs, ajo i vendos kufij k\u00ebsaj ideje ekzistencialiste qendrore t\u00eb vet\u00ebkrijimit dhe vet\u00ebp\u00ebrkufizimit, q\u00eb mund\u00ebson lirin\u00eb absolute t\u00eb cil\u00ebn Jean-Paul Sartre e parashtroi tek Qenia dhe Hi\u00e7i<\/em>. P\u00ebr dallim, de Beauvoir parashtron nj\u00eb pamje t\u00eb paqart\u00eb t\u00eb liris\u00eb njer\u00ebzore, n\u00eb t\u00eb cil\u00ebn grat\u00eb luftojn\u00eb kund\u00ebr disavantazheve t\u00eb dukshme t\u00eb trupit fem\u00ebror.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tek Seksi i Dyt\u00eb<\/em>, vepra e saj m\u00eb e famshme, de Beauvoir skicon nj\u00eb lloj historie ekzistenciale t\u00eb jet\u00ebs s\u00eb nj\u00eb gruaje: nj\u00eb histori se si q\u00ebndrimet e nj\u00eb gruaje ndaj trupit dhe funksioneve trupore ndryshojn\u00eb me kalimin e viteve dhe se si shoq\u00ebria ndikon n\u00eb k\u00ebto q\u00ebndrime. K\u00ebtu de Beauvoir ngre pyetjen thelb\u00ebsore t\u00eb mish\u00ebrimit fem\u00ebror: A jan\u00eb disavantazhet e supozuara t\u00eb trupit t\u00eb femr\u00ebs, disavantazhe aktuale q\u00eb ekzistojn\u00eb objektivisht n\u00eb t\u00eb gjitha shoq\u00ebrit\u00eb, apo ato thjesht gjykohen si disavantazhe nga shoq\u00ebria jon\u00eb? Ajo i p\u00ebrgjigjet k\u00ebsaj pyetjeje duke eksploruar raste studimore t\u00eb fazave t\u00eb ndryshme t\u00eb jet\u00ebs fem\u00ebrore. N\u00eb k\u00ebto raste studimore trupi fem\u00ebror paraqitet sa pozitiv ashtu edhe negativ, dhe grat\u00eb si t\u00eb shtypura dhe t\u00eb lira. Trupi i nj\u00eb gruaje \u00ebsht\u00eb vendi i k\u00ebsaj paqart\u00ebsie, sepse ajo mund ta p\u00ebrdor\u00eb at\u00eb si nj\u00eb mjet p\u00ebr lirin\u00eb e saj dhe t\u00eb ndihet e shtypur prej tij. Nuk ka asnj\u00eb t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb thelb\u00ebsore p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje: kjo varet nga shkalla n\u00eb t\u00eb cil\u00ebn nj\u00eb grua e sheh veten si nj\u00eb subjekt i lir\u00eb dhe jo si objekt i gjykimit t\u00eb shoq\u00ebris\u00eb.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Sartre v\u00ebrejti se \u00e7do gj\u00eb q\u00eb ne perceptojm\u00eb, duke p\u00ebrfshir\u00eb njer\u00ebzit e tjer\u00eb, p\u00ebrkthehet si “objekt” p\u00ebr shikimin ton\u00eb dhe p\u00ebrcaktohet nga ne. De Beauvoir e merr k\u00ebt\u00eb ide dhe e zbaton at\u00eb n\u00eb perceptimin e burrave p\u00ebr grat\u00eb. Vet\u00eb koncepti i \u201cgruas\u201d, argumenton de Beauvoir, \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb koncept mashkullor: gruaja \u00ebsht\u00eb gjithmon\u00eb \u201ctjetra\u201d sepse mashkulli \u00ebsht\u00eb \u201cshikuesi\u201d: pra ai \u00ebsht\u00eb subjekti dhe gruaja objekti – kuptimi i asaj se \u00e7ka do t\u00eb thot\u00eb t\u00eb jesh nj\u00eb grua, jepet pik\u00ebrisht nga burrat.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

De Beauvoir argumenton se nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb gjendja biologjike e gruas n\u00eb vetvete ajo q\u00eb krijon barriera: \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00ebnyra se si nj\u00eb grua e interpreton k\u00ebt\u00eb gjendje q\u00eb e b\u00ebn at\u00eb pozitive ose negative. Asnj\u00eb nga p\u00ebrvojat unike fem\u00ebrore \u2013 zhvillimi i organeve seksuale fem\u00ebrore, menstruacionet, shtatz\u00ebnia, menopauza \u2013 nuk kan\u00eb kuptim n\u00eb vetvete; por n\u00eb nj\u00eb shoq\u00ebri armiq\u00ebsore\/shtyp\u00ebse ato marrin kuptimin e t\u00eb qenurit barr\u00eb dhe disavantazh, pasi grat\u00eb arrijn\u00eb t\u00eb pranojn\u00eb kuptimet q\u00eb nj\u00eb shoq\u00ebri patriarkale u jep atyre.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

De Beauvoir thekson se djemt\u00eb dhe vajzat para adoleshenc\u00ebs nuk jan\u00eb v\u00ebrtet shum\u00eb t\u00eb ndrysh\u00ebm: ata “kan\u00eb t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat interesa dhe t\u00eb nj\u00ebjtat k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsi” (The Second Sex, f. 295, Translation and Ed, H.M. Parshley, Vintage, 1997). N\u00ebse dallimet fillestare psikologjike midis djemve dhe vajzave t\u00eb reja jan\u00eb relativisht t\u00eb par\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme, \u00e7far\u00eb i b\u00ebn q\u00eb ato t\u00eb b\u00ebhen t\u00eb r\u00ebnd\u00ebsishme pas nj\u00eb kohe? N\u00ebse dikush \u201cb\u00ebhet\u201d grua, si ndodh kjo \u201cb\u00ebrje\u201d?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mish\u00ebrimi dhe Fem\u00ebrorja<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

De Beauvoir argumenton se p\u00ebrderisa zhvillohet trupi i nj\u00eb vajze, \u00e7do faz\u00eb e re p\u00ebrjetohet si traumatike dhe e kufizon at\u00eb gjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb ashp\u00ebr nga seksi i kund\u00ebrt. Trupi i nj\u00eb vajze piqet e shoq\u00ebria reagon n\u00eb nj\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb gjithnj\u00eb e m\u00eb armiq\u00ebsore dhe k\u00ebrc\u00ebnuese ndaj saj. De Beauvoir flet p\u00ebr procesin e \u201cmish\u00ebrimit\u201d, i cili \u00ebsht\u00eb procesi n\u00eb t\u00eb cilin njeriu e p\u00ebrjeton veten si trup seksual i cili ekspozohet ndaj shikimit t\u00eb tjetrit. Kjo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb domosdoshm\u00ebrisht nj\u00eb e gj\u00eb e keqe; por p\u00ebr fat t\u00eb keq, kjo b\u00ebhet mizori kur vajzat e reja shpesh detyrohen t\u00eb mish\u00ebrohen kund\u00ebr vullnetit t\u00eb tyre:<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cVajza e re ndjen se trupi po i vidhet\u2026 n\u00eb rrug\u00eb burrat e ndjekin me sy dhe komentojn\u00eb p\u00ebr anatomin\u00eb e saj. Ajo do t\u00eb donte t\u00eb ishte e padukshme; mish\u00ebrimi e tremb<\/em>\u201d (f.333).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Ka shum\u00eb m\u00eb tep\u00ebr ngjarje t\u00eb tilla n\u00eb jet\u00ebn e nj\u00eb vajze, t\u00eb cilat p\u00ebrforcojn\u00eb besimin se \u00ebsht\u00eb fat i keq t\u00eb lind\u00ebsh n\u00eb nj\u00eb trup fem\u00ebror. Trupi i femr\u00ebs \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb shqet\u00ebsim, nj\u00eb dhimbje, nj\u00eb siklet, nj\u00eb problem p\u00ebr t’u p\u00ebrballur, i sh\u00ebmtuar, i sikletsh\u00ebm etj. Edhe n\u00ebse nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb p\u00ebrpiqet t\u00eb harroj\u00eb se ka nj\u00eb trup fem\u00ebror, shoq\u00ebria nuk harron t\u2019ia kujtoj\u00eb. De Beauvoir jep disa shembuj p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb: n\u00ebna q\u00eb kritikon shpesh trupin dhe q\u00ebndrimin e vajz\u00ebs s\u00eb saj, duke e b\u00ebr\u00eb at\u00eb t\u00eb ndihet e vet\u00ebdijshme mbi trupin; burrat n\u00eb rrug\u00eb q\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb komente seksuale mbi trupin e nj\u00eb vajze t\u00eb re, duke e b\u00ebr\u00eb t\u00eb turp\u00ebrohet; dhe sikleti i nj\u00eb vajze pasi t\u00eb af\u00ebrmit meshkuj b\u00ebjn\u00eb shaka p\u00ebr menstruacionet e saj.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Megjithat\u00eb, de Beauvoir jep edhe shembuj pozitiv mbi trupin fem\u00ebror. Ajo na tregon se ka situata n\u00eb t\u00eb cilat vajzat e reja mund t\u00eb ndjehen rehat n\u00eb trupin e tyre \u2013 n\u00eb fakt, jo vet\u00ebm rehat, por t\u00eb hareshme dhe krenare. Imagjinoni nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb q\u00eb k\u00ebnaqet duke ecur n\u00eb fusha dhe pyje, duke ndjer\u00eb nj\u00eb lidhje t\u00eb thell\u00eb me natyr\u00ebn. Ajo ka nj\u00eb ndjenj\u00eb t\u00eb madhe lumturie dhe lirie n\u00eb trupin e saj, t\u00eb cil\u00ebn nuk e ndjen n\u00eb nj\u00eb mjedis shoq\u00ebror. N\u00eb natyr\u00eb nuk ka meshkuj q\u00eb ta shikojn\u00eb trupin, nuk ka n\u00ebna q\u00eb ta kritikojn\u00eb at\u00eb. Ajo nuk e sheh m\u00eb veten me syt\u00eb e t\u00eb tjer\u00ebve dhe k\u00ebshtu m\u00eb n\u00eb fund \u00ebsht\u00eb e lir\u00eb t\u00eb p\u00ebrcaktoj\u00eb trupin e saj p\u00ebr vetveten.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Por, arratisja e p\u00ebrhershme n\u00eb natyr\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb e pamundur. T\u00eb jesh pjes\u00eb e shoq\u00ebrive patriarkale do t\u00eb thot\u00eb t\u2019i n\u00ebnshtrohesh disa ngjarjeve traumatike, e nd\u00ebr to \u00ebsht\u00eb edhe kontakti i par\u00eb seksual. Marr\u00ebdh\u00ebniet seksuale jan\u00eb fizikisht m\u00eb traumatike p\u00ebr vajzat, meq\u00eb p\u00ebrfshin\u00eb penetrimin dhe shpesh (por jo gjithmon\u00eb), dhimbje. Kulturalisht \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb traumatike sepse vajzat i mbajn\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb situat\u00eb t\u00eb vazhdueshme injorance mbi seksin dhe shpesh jan\u00eb t\u00eb pap\u00ebrgatitura p\u00ebr at\u00eb q\u00eb do t\u00eb vij\u00eb. Madje kulturalisht, ka disa teknika t\u00eb marr\u00ebdh\u00ebnieve seksuale q\u00eb mbizot\u00ebrojn\u00eb, t\u00eb cilat mund t\u00eb mos jen\u00eb ideale p\u00ebr k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsin\u00eb dhe orgazm\u00ebn fem\u00ebrore (p\u00ebr shembull, mashkulli n\u00eb pozit\u00ebn n\u00eb krye). De Beauvoir thekson se edukimi seksual i vajzave priret t\u00eb jet\u00eb kryesisht i llojit \u201cromantik\u201d, i cili thekson periudh\u00ebn e miq\u00ebsis\u00eb dhe k\u00ebnaq\u00ebsin\u00eb e p\u00ebrk\u00ebdheljeve t\u00eb buta, por asnj\u00ebher\u00eb dep\u00ebrtimin. K\u00ebshtu, kur m\u00eb n\u00eb fund ndodh seksi, duket nj\u00eb bot\u00eb larg fantazive romantike me t\u00eb cilat \u00ebsht\u00eb rritur nj\u00eb vajz\u00eb. De Beauvoir v\u00ebren se p\u00ebr t\u00eb ren\u00eb e tronditur “dashuria merr aspektin e nj\u00eb operacioni kirurgjik” (f.404).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

N\u00eb fund t\u00eb fundit, a \u00ebsht\u00eb vet\u00eb dep\u00ebrtimi biologjik q\u00eb shkakton shqet\u00ebsimin, apo \u00ebsht\u00eb injoranca e krijuar nga kultura e grave t\u00eb reja? De Beauvoir mendon se faktet biologjike nuk duhet t\u00eb jen\u00eb traumatike: shqet\u00ebsimi \u00ebsht\u00eb p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb munges\u00ebs s\u00eb bujaris\u00eb n\u00eb sjelljen seksuale t\u00eb burrit, e kombinuar me frik\u00ebn e gruas p\u00ebr t’u objektivizuar p\u00ebrpara nj\u00eb v\u00ebshtrimi agresiv seksual. Ajo sugjeron se rruga p\u00ebr nj\u00eb eksperienc\u00eb seksuale m\u00eb pozitive p\u00ebr t\u00eb dyja gjinit\u00eb \u00ebsht\u00eb n\u00ebp\u00ebrmjet sjelljes s\u00eb secilit partner n\u00eb \u201cbujari erotike\u201d ndaj tjetrit, sesa n\u00eb sensualiz\u00ebm egoist.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

P\u00ebrvoja e shtatz\u00ebnis\u00eb ka imazh m\u00eb pozitiv, por ende q\u00ebndron e paqart\u00eb p\u00ebr grat\u00eb: mund t\u00eb jet\u00eb nj\u00ebkoh\u00ebsisht nj\u00eb pushtim i padrejt\u00eb i trupit t\u00eb saj ose nj\u00eb eksperienc\u00eb e mrekullueshme. P\u00ebrderisa shtatz\u00ebnia e nj\u00eb gruaje zhvillohet, shoq\u00ebria priret ta konsideroj\u00eb at\u00eb m\u00eb pak t\u00ebrheq\u00ebse seksualisht, si jo m\u00eb t\u00eb disponueshme seksualisht. Kjo do t\u00eb thot\u00eb se ajo i shp\u00ebton p\u00ebrkoh\u00ebsisht shikimeve seksuale t\u00eb mashkullit. Ky \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb zhvillim pozitiv p\u00ebr nj\u00eb grua, argumenton de Beauvoir, sepse “tani ajo nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb m\u00eb n\u00eb sh\u00ebrbim si objekt seksual, por \u00ebsht\u00eb mish\u00ebrimi i qenies s\u00eb saj, ajo p\u00ebrfaq\u00ebson premtimin e jet\u00ebs, t\u00eb p\u00ebrjet\u00ebsis\u00eb” (f.518).<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Po kur nj\u00eb grua plaket? Gruaja e moshuar p\u00ebrshkruhet nga de Beauvoir si dikush “q\u00eb synonte t\u00eb luftonte kund\u00ebr nj\u00eb fatkeq\u00ebsie q\u00eb po e shp\u00ebrfytyronte dhe e deformonte n\u00eb m\u00ebnyr\u00eb misterioze” (f.595). Ky \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb p\u00ebrshkrim shum\u00eb negativ i procesit t\u00eb plakjes. Ajo ting\u00ebllon si nj\u00eb reklame kozmetike q\u00eb u b\u00ebn presion grave t\u00eb blejn\u00eb produktet e tyre p\u00ebr t\u00eb luftuar kund\u00ebr koh\u00ebs. Sidoqoft\u00eb, p\u00ebrshkrimi i de Beauvoir \u00ebsht\u00eb nj\u00eb p\u00ebrshkrim i sinqert\u00eb. Ne e dim\u00eb nga shkrimet e saj autobiografike se ajo me t\u00eb v\u00ebrtet\u00eb luftoi t\u00eb pajtohej me trupin e saj t\u00eb plakur: i p\u00eblqenin rrobat, konsiderohej t\u00ebrheq\u00ebse dhe ndihej e m\u00ebrzitur kur mendonte se po humbiste \u201cshk\u00eblqimin\u201d e saj. Megjithat\u00eb, si filozofe, ajo ishte n\u00eb gjendje t\u00eb t\u00ebrhiqej dhe t\u00eb shihte se ky q\u00ebndrim ishte p\u00ebr shkak t\u00eb nj\u00eb vlere t\u00eb tepruar t\u00eb vendosur nga shoq\u00ebria ndaj fenomeneve t\u00eb tilla kalimtare. Ajo tashm\u00eb e kishte pranuar p\u00ebrkufizimin e shoq\u00ebror mbi vlerat e saja si q\u00ebndrim personal.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

De Beauvoir pranon se teksa nj\u00eb grua k\u00ebmb\u00ebngul gjat\u00eb plakjes, ajo mund ta gjej\u00eb veten n\u00eb nj\u00eb faz\u00eb m\u00eb pozitive gjat\u00eb jet\u00ebs: \u201cGrat\u00eb mund t\u00eb rezistojn\u00eb ndaj mod\u00ebs dhe ndaj mendimit se ‘\u00e7far\u00eb do q\u00eb t\u00eb thon\u00eb njer\u00ebzit’, ajo \u00ebsht\u00eb e \u00e7liruar nga shoq\u00ebria, detyrimet, dieta dhe kujdesi p\u00ebr bukurin\u00eb e saj\u201d (f.595). Pra, megjith\u00ebse pleq\u00ebria ka shum\u00eb aspekte negative, ajo mund t\u00eb siguroj\u00eb nj\u00eb lloj shp\u00ebtimi nga presioni i shoq\u00ebris\u00eb. D\u00ebshira p\u00ebr t’u p\u00ebrshtatur bllokohet dhe liria rritet. Q\u00ebllimi i De Beauvoir \u00ebsht\u00eb t\u00eb tregoj se liria ka nevoj\u00eb p\u00ebr hap\u00ebsir\u00eb p\u00ebr t\u00eb l\u00ebvizur. N\u00eb rastin e mish\u00ebrimit fem\u00ebror, shpesh nuk ka vend p\u00ebr grat\u00eb q\u00eb v\u00ebrtet ato \u201ct\u00eb shohin trupat e tyre p\u00ebrmes shikimit t\u00eb tyre\u201d, pasi v\u00ebshtrimi mashkullor p\u00ebrshkon kudo.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hap\u00ebsirat e liris\u00eb<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Nd\u00ebrthurja e trupit dhe mendjes ndihmon n\u00eb shpjegimin e shtypjes s\u00eb grave. Grat\u00eb nuk zgjedhin t\u00eb mendojn\u00eb negativisht p\u00ebr trupin dhe proceset e tyre trupore; p\u00ebrkundrazi ato jan\u00eb t\u00eb detyruara ta b\u00ebjn\u00eb k\u00ebt\u00eb si rezultat i p\u00ebrfshirjes n\u00eb nj\u00eb shoq\u00ebri patriarkale armiq\u00ebsore. Nga ky k\u00ebndv\u00ebshtrim, trupi nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb ve\u00e7 di\u00e7ka materiale, ai formohet nga nj\u00eb boll\u00ebk perceptimesh: n\u00ebse ndihemi keq p\u00ebr t\u00eb, ai b\u00ebhet nj\u00eb “gj\u00eb e keqe”; n\u00ebse ndihemi mir\u00eb me t\u00eb, b\u00ebhet nj\u00eb \u201cgj\u00eb e mir\u00eb\u201d. Por m\u00ebnyra se si ne mendojm\u00eb p\u00ebr k\u00ebt\u00eb nuk \u00ebsht\u00eb \u00e7\u00ebshtje e zgjedhjes s\u00eb lir\u00eb, p\u00ebrve\u00e7 n\u00ebse jetojm\u00eb n\u00eb nj\u00eb shoq\u00ebri q\u00eb i jep hap\u00ebsir\u00eb asaj lirie. Ajo q\u00eb synojn\u00eb t\u00eb b\u00ebjn\u00eb filozof\u00ebt feminist\u00eb si de Beauvoir \u00ebsht\u00eb t\u00eb krijojn\u00eb hap\u00ebsira p\u00ebr lul\u00ebzimin e k\u00ebsaj lirie.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Felicity Joseph<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

E p\u00ebrktheu:\u00a0Medin\u00eb Dauti<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tekstin origjinal mund ta gjeni n\u00eb: https:\/\/philosophynow.org\/issues\/69\/Becoming_A_Woman_Simone_de_Beauvoir_on_Female_Embodiment<\/a><\/p>\n\n\n\n

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